I have spent a lot of time thinking about things that I can control and things that I cannot control, and it has not made me feel any better about anything. You know when you feel like you’ve finally established the difference between the two so now you can understand things better. You can work …
I don’t understand my feelings recently. I don’t even have the energy to feel. I know I’m numb, but everything just looks like broken glass. I’m fighting the need to feel sorry for myself but its getting really hard when things keep showing me my worthlessness. Everyone wants to fix me, but no one wants …
I hate it when I want to write and every thought I had suddenly vanishes. Okay they have returned, now let’s get to it. My mind has always been a constant rollercoaster of thoughts. Like how our hearts are constantly beating at all times so is my mind constantly thinking. Sometimes those thoughts align to …
I can fear everything about a man but never the man himself. You’d think based on all my past experiences with the male species, both traumatic and otherwise, I’d be terrified of men. Unfortunately, that’s far, very much far from what I feel for them. As much as I’d love to discuss my trauma to …
This was a hard write, but so has everything I have been writing since I could write again. Whoever thought that day would come that the most confident person I know would lose it all. Sometimes it’s funny how you talk yourself into building this persona that is amazing, then you again talk yourself into …
I want to be held forever in his loving arms. I want to be loved unconditionally. But how can someone as undeniably perfect as he is, fall for an ugly bundle of imperfection that is me, it wasn’t possible. I would probably end up alone or with someone of the exact state and live in …
I miss you. I actually do miss you quite a lot. As I am seated here, sad and alone, I can’t help but miss you and wish you were here with me. I miss the good times we spent together. I miss the smiles, laughter, anger, sadness, kisses, gifts and love that we shared. I …
A thousand voices speaking all at once, all saying different things. I try my best to give each one of them a chance to speak but chaos listens to no one. They all want their voices to be heard no matter the cost. They don’t care about my sanity. They don’t care about anyone but …
I wonder how he feels whenever I shut that door at his face. I’ve done it so many times. I just did it right now. Shutting him out him out my house. It’s getting harder to keep doing this to him but it’s for our own good and its better this way. The closer he …
My single rose in my field of daises. My rarity. That one person that makes things change for him. That person that I can hardly say no to. That person that sees me for who and what I am and not who I make everyone think I am. That one person that would won’t see …
