I think for the first time in a long time I am being haunted by the memories of a lover. For a long time, I have thought that something was wrong with me. I have thought that I may have incurred an incurable disease that makes me unable to feel pleasure. I could achieve it …
GRIEF I have never lost someone to the hands of death before, more so to the hands of life. I have lost people to the circle of life. To people choosing to leave my life for whatever reason or for the circumstances of life drifting us apart. In particular I have noticed certain patterns that …
You know I could just keep quiet and enjoy the benefits of my silence but that’s not what I want. I have not asked for much but for you to show me the affection you always speak of to me. Yet you find it so difficult to do. The moment I ask for material things …
I have thought about it, asked about it, felt it and experienced it enough to know that I am worthless. I am a useless piece of furniture that constantly gets repossessed but never retained. It can be said to be a good thing to always be wanted but what’s the point if you are never …
ME (19th NOVEMBER 2023) He said I was the rainbow in his life. I was colourful and filled with so much vibrance that he never wanted our time to end, but all things must come to an end. Everyday my sparkle was too enchanting to be ignored so the attention of his was never wavering. Then …
You know in my short time on earth I’ve learnt oh so much. And one of the many things that I have learned is that people prefer their ideas over the reality of things. They like the concepts that they have created in their heads and when the reality is different they become agitated. I’d …
Too many people seeking to have their voices heard, screaming, shouting sounding like a pack of wild animals that have been left to starve. Fighting for a piece of meat that only a few people can actually consume. I understand the animalistic nature of humans. I understand that people feel the need to speak up …
When I said if you’d leave me, I’d die, it’s because I actually thought that I would, and when you let me, I actually did. Not in the physical representation of death but in the sense that a part of me died with you and the pain of losing you felt like dying. It was …
ME (12th JUNE 2023) Can’t remember the last time I wrote without music, so we’ll see how this goes. I feel like a sort of life update is needed but not right now. That requires a certain sense of stability that I don’t particularly have at the moment. There are good days and bad days but …
I have chosen the path that protects my heart from pain. I have chosen to speak when it is needed not wanted. I have chosen to not shed a tear for anyone anymore. I have chosen to make decisions that put me first. I have chosen not to hurt others, because I have felt pain …
