There is this popular saying that ‘all that glitters is not gold’. As popular as the saying is the meaning quite simple, it means that looks can be deceiving. It means that you should be careful about the people you surround yourself with, the people you get into intimate relationships with, the people you work with, the people you live with, the person you decide to marry, and every situation and relationship that involves you and someone else needs high level of cautiousness. The world is scary, and people are scarier.
In as much as people require caution so does everything else that comes with existing as a person. The reason for this discussion is broad, kind of. So, in as much as we’d like to believe that we know someone, we don’t. If push comes to shove, you’d be surprised at the actions of that person. I don’t want to make you any less trustful than you are but I want to be realistic. The only thing that is constant in this world is change and people are constantly changing. You and I are no different either.
There is also this popular saying ‘dress the way you’d like to be addressed’. I believe in some cases this is viable while others it isn’t. I think in this generation we have learnt that it doesn’t matter what you wear but who you are. Especially now that everyone is either trying to blend in or stand out. Either way just because someone may look a certain way doesn’t give you the right to make assumptions about how they are and treat them a certain way. That also bring me to racial and cultural stereotypes. We know about them and even act on them. But let this be very clear just because something is a popular opinion doesn’t make it true. I won’t deny that stereotypes begin with some form of truth, but it has been vastly abused and cannot be trusted, just like the internet and social media sometimes. The fact that an entire culture or race is put into this tiny box of generalization is ridiculous. Just because they look a certain way doesn’t mean they are all the same. No two persons on this earth, no matter how many billions of us there are, are the same. There is no doubt that there would be similarities but that doesn’t make us the same. That just builds grounds for you to build a relationship. Putting an entire race, culture or gender in a box is very unrealistic and dumb.
In as much as a stranger is a whole new experience that you never really know what to expect, those we know are a different story. Before I go on, I’d like to say that although first impressions are deal breakers and should be trusted, that doesn’t always apply all the time. Regardless always be cautious.
Its very hard to be human and live in this crazy world because you never know the intentions of other people. I’ve seen and heard things that constantly remind me that no matter how much you trust and think you know a person, you never really do. They might be this invaluable person to you and the next minute you are both strangers. This minute this person is your lover and partner, the next you are identifying them in a police line-up or signing divorce papers over things that if properly discussed you both wouldn’t have gotten involved in the first place. Things that you both hid from each other because everyone always wants to put their best foot forward but forgets that in order for a relationship to be built all parties involved actually have to be their true selves to know their true selves.
But then it has still been proven that when all precautionary measures are taken it could still be proving lacking, because people change over time and their intentions are also susceptible to change. Another view is that people are manipulators and can hide their true intentions until the deed is done. Sometimes there are side remarks, unfunny joke, little attitudes and actions that show their true intentions but as humans we either brush it off or fail to notice it all together. It’s not your fault, you trusted them, they mattered to you and couldn’t have possibly done what they did, but you should face facts that people will always be people and you have no control over that. It is not your fault that things went wrong, people can be shitty sometimes and life just sucks sometimes.
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